BibDitties

Pictures at the Library

Recorded by: Emiless

I walk in the library door, mi amor
On two legs, not four
I'm here to score books galore and more
It's not like a store and not like a whore (ho ....)
Cuz you don't pay, except with your taxes
Or if you send faxes to Texas

Sometimes I send emails to females
Or I read about Lee Nails or sea snails or free whales
Like Willy! This may sound silly
But I have this pal Billy in Philly
And I need his Zip code
Cuz this address is old and I'm told he moved up the road

I lost a load of gold in stock I owned in a co. that folded
Damn! I should've sold it
But this investment letter said "hold it"

I'm richer (at the library)
Ain't bitchin' (at the library)
I'm a fixture (at the library)
Get the picture? (at the library)

Mama was hard
Called me retarded
I'm a star with a card and I'm readin' the Bard
And I'm just gettin' started, you cold-hearted bitch
Now I've got an itch for some Adrienne Rich

You can stay in your kitchen
Boozin' and snackin'
I'm cruisin' the stacks 'n'
I'm loose 'n' I'm back
In the game without blinkin'
I'm thinkin' like Lincoln
I'm drinkin' the ink in
Is Lord of the Rings in?

I'm richer ...

Mussorgsky, Morrissey, ODB, Dorsey
So many CDs, this library floors me
The staff, they adore me
They never ignore me
And seas of movies please my endorphins

I like to check out DVDs
And take them home to watch in my BVDs
Species, Striptease, Frampton and the Bee Gees
Now, I admit that these are cheesy
Look them up on IMDB
Web access or books on chess
Don't guess, just ask them at the desk

I'm richer ...

Get the picture?
(Damn)

(Lyrics: Smith; music: Smith/Mussorgsky)